GRADUATION # 3

When we had two babies

life was perfect.

Two babies, two parents...

One Mommy...One Daddy.

One boy...One girl.

Pink and Blue.

Baseballs and Tutus.

tidy.

little.

family.

But from the minute I had number two, I was not done.

I consulted the books, Like I used to do in the old days.
"Birth Order Blues" and 

Asked people with three or more kids...how did you decide?...

How is it?

Tell me.Tell me. Am I being greedy?

I already am so blessed with two healthy babies, at MY age.

....The we got pregnant.

And I got very afraid that I had perhaps pushed the limits.

And then I lost that baby.

That is when I KNEW FOR CERTAIN
 I wanted three more than I had ever dreamed.

And a few months later.

We were pregnant again. I found out the first day of thIS century.

When I discovered that it was not JUST a hangover that had me dizzy.

The transition from Two to Three was for me...the easiest.
 I stopped reading the parenting books...

(except "1,2,3...Magic" ...I read that one.)

I was deep in baby mode. Baby world. My house was a baby house.

gates. bottles. diapers in a few sizes.

our "old" life, the one we had been pretty successful at holding onto,

social events, traveling...was a thing of the past.

We had 100% a baby life. Our days and our nights revolved around them

and that was just fine.

It was a joyful time.

Yes, it was utterly physically exhausting...

and I would have paid good money for 6 straight hours of sleep...

But it was FULL of joy.

We have traveled so far.

Everything COOPER does...

 always carries, for me, extra significance...

....like the last time you see someone you love.

The last time you drive down a road.

THE last time....

His milestones mark time for me. Make me feel old. 

and he keeps me young.

Cooper is what one would call 

"a fine young man"

He is kind and sensitive and incredibly smart

and sensationally funny.

His signature mop of curly light brown hair

can be seen in any crowd.

He IS and will always be my baby...

and Today,  "the baby" 
graduates Elementary school. 

well...now That got here fast.
One week after he stated first grade...
my Mom died.
She missed it all.
The plays, the fairs, the crafts...the growing.
and yet isn't it she who has been watching over us?
Keeping us safe.
Sending us Charlie
to save my life?

It ALL goes too fast.

All of it.
Heck, I can remember 5th grade.
And Allison Burnett.
and my beloved music teacher.


Seize the day.
Say hooray.
Don't over think it.